I saw on Have I Got News For You that Google is using software to scan out-of-copyright books so that they can turn them into ebooks. Unfortunately for Google, their software reads some words in certain typefaces incorrectly.
This results in some absolutely fantastic malapropisms (the act of using an incorrect word in place of one that is similar in pronunciation).

The software can’t tell the difference between arms and anus in certain typefaces. Also burn and bum.

Paul Merton suggests A Farewell to Anus as a title they might have misread.
They kick the joke around a bit and finish with the fantastic:
Ian Hislop: In Scotland what happens? Is it Bums’ Night?
Andy Hamilton: Where they all join anuses and sing Auld Lang Syne.

See the whole brilliant piece on HIGNFY here (the Google section starts at 23 mins 55 secs).

Let’s just hope you don’t have to head to the burns unit to see about a problem with your arms.

Just to balance things out – Google do some amazing things. And even this book scanning project is an amazing task (the scanning problems aside).
My particular favourite is the Google Art Project.
It lets you stroll virtually round hundreds of galleries around the world. From the comfort of your own home.
Here’s a screen grab of the Metropolitan Museum of Art in New York.

The Metropolitan Museum of Art - now available in your home

The Metropolitan Museum of Art – now available in your home

Spend some time surrounded by some outstanding art by clicking here.

Always remember

November 9, 2014

Never forget the sacrifices they made

Never forget the sacrifices they made